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ARTICLES CATEGORY "
Humor " 
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| IT'S ADDLEPATED APRIL AGAIN!
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28 Jul 2008 11:54:20
| Beatrice Blitterless & Earl Craboon |
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Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005.
IT’S ADDLEPATED APRIL AGAIN! -- Or, time for feather-brained
folk to have some fun! --
Compiled by Leady Beatrice Blitterlees and edited by Lord Earl
Craboon
April is one of those months that most pithy people would rather
forget. After all, it’s the only month that starts off on a
“fool ... |
| How To Become A Trillionaire and Lose 20 lbs.
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27 Jul 2008 06:46:20
| Murray Trillionaire |
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I have created a twelve step program to help you to become a trillionaire by next month while losing inches off of your waist. Twelve is a very mystical number. There are twelve planets in our galaxy, if you count Earth four times, five if you don't consider Pluto to be a planet. There were twelve peo ... |
| Fone Booth Frenzy!
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23 Jul 2008 11:13:32
| Nancy Cardone |
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How often do you have to go to a phone booth these days? Probably not too often. Well, I found myself needing to make a phone call while on the road and guess what? The unthinkable!....I left my cell phone home!
First of all, it took a while for it to hit me that phone booths still exist! Well they probably don't really, not the type that you ... |
| George Bush Psychotic Legacy Fears Drive Him to Nuke Iran
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23 Jul 2008 04:30:20
| Karen Fish |
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The very first commander at West Point was Benedict Arnold. The most famous pig ever was Arnold Ziffel. Arnold Ziffel appeared on the television show Green Acres starring Eddie Albert and Eva Gabor, the sister of Zsa Zsa Gabor. Who names their child Zsa Zsa Gabor? On the show Green Acres, the childless neighbors of Eddie ... |
| IS GOD A DEMOCRAT OR A REPUBLICAN? AND OTHER CULTURAL ANOMALIES
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19 Jul 2008 04:36:11
| Rev. James L. Snyder |
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The amazing thing about contemporary American culture is its
predisposition to organize itself into neat little categories.
This "pigeonhole syndrome," referred to by some as PHS, (not to
be confused with PMS), is responsible for much of the stress in
our society today.
We even categorize this stress, enabling us to compare our ... |
| 25 Reasons You Might Need to Wear a Welding Helmet
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14 Jul 2008 10:53:20
| Kaitlin Carruth |
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/p>
A welding
helmet is a safety device worn for protection while one is
welding;
however, there are definitely many other uses for a welding
helmet. A welding helmet is a very practical that should be
found in every home. Here are just a few ways you might find
yourself in need of a welding helmet:
1. You can't find ... |
| Office Pranks and Revenge Ideas
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08 Jul 2008 11:52:43
| Dr.Revenge |
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Office Pranks and Revenge Ideas
Man, life at the office can be pretty boring! Not to mention those certain people who walk around like they have something big stuck in well...you get the idea. The way I see it, we have to do something to help us survive our 5 or more days a week around these places. So ... |
| WHAT'S IN A NAME? -- Odd Places in America
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24 Jun 2008 08:29:34
| Victoria Elizabeth |
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Copyright Victoria Elizabeth 2004. All rights reserved.
WHAT DO 'DEAD HORSE' AND 'DEVIL'S BACKBONE' HAVE IN COMMON?
-- A Misguided Guide to Unusual Placenames in America --
It is said that England has more than a few rather quaint
placenames such as Bodmin, Grimbister, Ipswich, Nobottle, No
Man's Land, Pie Corner, Pratt' ... |
| Timothy Ward's Great Coloring Book Rebirth
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16 Jun 2008 06:24:21
| Timothy Ward |
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I bought a coloring book yesterday from Wal-Mart. I hadn't
colored in years and I got the strange urge to out of the blue.
I also bought a 24-pack of Crayola crayons. The box says they
are non-toxic which is a relief. I just wonder who sells the
toxic crayons and how they compare in price to the crayons I
bought. Som ... |
| Star Maps
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15 Jun 2008 08:48:26
| Stephen Schochet |
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Since movie stars have moved into the big mansions of Beverly
Hills and Bel-Air, vendors have sold maps of their homes with
varying accuracy. Although most stars resent unwanted intrusions
of fans, many take it with good humor. Sitting in his swimming
pool, Oliver Hardy would welcome fans who climbed over his ... |
| Jesus Drives A Dodge?
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12 Jun 2008 12:30:48
| Joanna Simmons |
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Jesus Drives A Dodge
Just as any typical drive on 1-35 highway to downtown; we were listening to the radio, chit chatting, talking on the cell phone.
Then bang... I switched lanes and I am right behind Jesus.
Yes, that is right, I said... I was right behind Jesus.
I am not sure what was more shocking to find myself behind Jesus or ... |
| More Than A Hunch
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10 Jun 2008 07:05:51
| Amy Wink Krebs |
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Mrs. Carol Brady - Florence Henderson
Mr. Mike Brady - Robert Reed
Alice - Ann B. Davis
Marsha Brady - Maureen McCormack
Jan Brady - Eve Plumb
Cindy Brady - Susan Olsen
Greg Brady - Barry Williams
Peter Brady - Christopher Knight
Bobby Brady - Mike Lookinland
The Brady Bunch. In thirty minutes flat, they give us deliciously vapid, refreshingly ... |
| The Weirdness of the Japanese
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07 Jun 2008 01:49:30
| Steve Sommers |
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I hope Hollywood decides to make no more horror movies based on
Japanese ones. They're really boring and not the least bit
scarey. Right now I'm thinking of 'The Ring' and the 'The
Grudge' and I've seen ads for 'Black Water' which I absolutely
will not see or rent in the future because I learned my lesson
from those first two. Bot ... |
| It finally happened
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25 May 2008 01:42:31
| Birmingham UK Com |
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As we get older some of us tend to lose our inhibitions and
begin to speak out more. Some would say grumpy old men and
others might be more charitable and say that we speak our mind
but for me, today, it finally happened. At last I got chance to
do something I have always wanted to.
The day started off pretty much the same as any normal Saturda ... |
| The Gingerbread Nightmare
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18 May 2008 08:36:58
| Valerie Garner |
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Do you ever see those beautiful gingerbread houses during the
holiday seasons that are so beautiful? They look so simple, and
look like such a fun project to do with the kids making gifts
for grandma and grandpa. I could just feel it….soft Christmas
music in the background, the warm, spicy smell of gingerbread
filling the air, the ... |
| How I Spent My Summer Vacation
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13 May 2008 10:12:51
| Lee Goins |
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One of the best parts of a vacation is the positive outlook you derive from pleasant anticipation. Another benefit is the afterglow, allowing you to feel right with the world. A general guideline I have is to live in the present and not yearn too heavily for the past or future; but making brief exceptions for things like vacations ... |
| Family Guy - Biography Of Peter Griffin.
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08 May 2008 05:50:57
| Jack |
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Peter Griffin is one of the funniest, probably the most
important characters in the cartoon animation series of 'Family
Guy'. He is a Nice, Funny, Fat ass character, who is not afraid
of spreading the word of his mind in to the world and change
everybody's world. Peter's mind is 2X smaller then Homer Sim ... |
| Female, Horny, Middle Aged and behaving Badly
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05 May 2008 04:04:41
| Esther Austin |
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Female, Horny, Middle Aged and Behaving Badly
As a woman – I am often surprised to find that many of us do not
seem to be in touch with our sensuality or sexuality. Or maybe
its because we are not willing to admit to having such feelings
– no wonder we’re sometimes called all manner of names. But I
digress… I’m ... |
| A dog's guide to... Getting Your Dog to Stop Barking
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02 May 2008 11:22:52
| Rubin |
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I like to bark. I mean, I like to bark A LOT. So, whattya gonna
do about it? Well, if you’re Amber and Terry, you’re going to do
NOTHING about it. Ain’t nobody going to silence the Rubinman,
you know what I’m sayin’? If you’re NOT Amber and Terry, though
(i.e. you’re smart) and you want to know how to get your dog to ... |
| Free Funny Ecard and Free Funny Ecards
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29 Apr 2008 07:41:59
| Christian |
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A free
funny ecard is a way to brighten someones day whether you
are living in the same area or whether you are living far away.
Free funny ecards are available through several different
websites. Many of these websites will have free funny ecards
that are in 3d and have many different types of pictures. A fre ... |
| A tale of the hunt
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28 Apr 2008 04:53:59
| Gregory J. Ballan |
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My good friend Brian and I love hunting. We’ve been chasing the
elusive Whitetail deer all across the fields and woodlands of
our home state of Massachusetts. Now, Massachusetts isn’t
regarded as a great hunting state, but there are deer here, you
just have to gain access to the privately held lands that are a
goldmine for hunting. This is what ... |
| Everything I Need To Know I Learned From Drinking Coffee
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28 Apr 2008 11:19:41
| Deb Voss Quail and Roxanne Vincent |
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After analyzing over 17,000 Dutch men and women, researchers
recently concluded that those who drank seven or more cups of
coffee a day were half as likely to develop type 2 diabetes than
those who drank two cups or less. The study was led by Rob van
Dam while at the Dutch National Institute for Public Health and
Environment in Bilthoven. ... |
| "Lots Of Fish In The Sea..."
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27 Apr 2008 03:22:58
| Jeremy Rizal S |
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Part One | by Jeremy Rizal S.
Mary was dumped by her boyfriend. Everywhere that Mary went the
gossip was sure to go. Her work mates were of no help
whatsoever. When she got within hearing distance of them, they'd
pretend to be nice to her. And he was tired of hearing the same
old phrase over and over...
"Don't worry ... |
| I'm A Romance Novel Hero!
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27 Apr 2008 03:02:35
| Ed Williams |
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Before we get started here, let me tell y’all that what you’re
about to read is the absolute truth. The absolute, unvarnished
truth. I swear it on every one of my Elvis and BTO CDs. Now,
let’s get right down to it, y’all just focus your eyes on the
following sentence:
I was the inspiration for the male lead ... |
| The Utensils You Need to be a Good Cook
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27 Apr 2008 05:02:15
| Vicki Nunn |
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After I sat down at a nearby medical centre, I glanced through a home and gardening magazine, dated unsurprisingly from fifteen years earlier. Being the culinary whiz that I am, I couldn't help but be intrigued by the article entitled 'The utensils you need to be a good cook.'
"Wow!" I thought, "So that's all it takes - just the right ... |
| Hi! I'm a Happy Axe Murderer!
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24 Apr 2008 05:24:46
| Denise Tarka |
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The shriek was one of complete, conscious fear. Their parents raced to the room. Matthew stood over his quivering, prostrate sister, plastic axe in hand, beaming.
Matthew's father boomed, "WHAT HAPPENED HERE?"
His sister choked out the words between sobs, "He, he hit me with his axe."
Matthew's mother checked her dar ... |
| Some People Will Eat Anything
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22 Apr 2008 06:53:27
| Tim Knox |
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Most people are like Mikey, the old Life cereal kid. We are nondiscriminating carnivores who will eat anything -- especially if it can be made to taste like chicken
WARNING: This week's column contains news so scary, so utterly horrific, that I, the author of said column, hereby declare that I will not be held responsible for the men ... |
| 10 THINGS NOT TO LEAVE IN POCKETS
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20 Apr 2008 09:56:40
| O.P. Hadweenzic |
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Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005.
10 THINGS NOT TO LEAVE IN POCKETS
Or why these facts are important to good mental & physical
health
Ovid Publius Hadweenzic, Ph.D., Professor of Pith n' Vinegar,
(and an avid reader of paltry poetry by a little-known and quite
inept weaver-of-wool from a small Welsh village that few ca ... |
| What's in a name?
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13 Apr 2008 12:30:22
| ganobristol |
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When we moved to Bombay, we found it quite odd how everyone wants to know not only the locality you live in, but also the name of the apartment complex. Its something that we've not seen anywhere else, not in Kansas City, not it Providence, not in Bangalore and not in Delhi either. Housing complex/society names are a big deal here. Mos ... |
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